¡Gracias por compartir! / Thanks for sharing!

«…many of you have probably noticed that it’s not much like that; the emotional state of our children is changing…«

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It would seem that our children are happy with quarantine, it means no school so they can spend time at home doing whatever they want; spend all day in their pjs, play around, fun time with their parents, watch their favorite tv shows, or play their beloved video games.

But, many of you have probably noticed that it’s not much like that; the emotional state of our children is changing, and it’s not because they feel alone, since we are with them 24/7; our children feel locked up and they can also feel our uncertainty and concern.

After the first few days of fun and joy, they’ve started to feel that the life they are living is not normal. They can’t leave the house, they can’t see their friends; they can tell their parents are worried, watching the news and having conversations they’ve never heard before; they note that our mood is not the same. So, if you think about it, it is only logical that our children feel emotionally unstable.

A few days ago, I noticed these changes on my 9-year-old son and I honestly didn’t know what to do. There are no help books for this kind of situation, but I think it’s important to seek help from an expert so we can react the best way possible; remember that the mental health of our children is our responsibility.

With that in mind, I contacted Psychologist Verónica Jiménez: PdyD in Education, Clinical Psychologist specialized in childhood and adolescence disorders, Social Communicator with a Master’s Degree in Education and Information Technology; CEO and Academic Director at Poliestudios; and mom of three kids.

MJ: Doctor, what is happening, or what are our children feeling during this quarantine we are in?

DVJ: Children from 0 to 7 years old could feel that it’s something normal, depending on their parents’ behavior.

From 7 to 12-year-old’s it is the moment of terror, fear and nightmares. They assume that the world will end, so we must spread calm.

13+ year old’s see things with criticality: “What will happen to our families?”, “How are we going to live if my parents can’t go to work?”

Based on that, the calmness and care from their parents are fundamental containment spaces.

MJ: How can we help our children overcome this quarantine?

DVJ: When we think about our children, who are besides all the good in the world, playful, mischievous, and always moving and exploring, which is their way to discover life, we face a big challenge during this quarantine that seems to take dizzily longer.

I would like to give you some recommendations for this time at home with the kids:

Structure a schedule

Give them a routine that allows them to understand that days go by. For example: print a schedule and check the days that have passed, on it we can write the emotions we felt that day, that way we can identify what we are doing right at home, and what can generate conflict.

School rhythm

School continues, we as parents have to adapt to it. Allow your children to carry on with that process autonomically; however, you can’t forget to take a look out and make sure that education online has the necessary importance.

Chores

Chores like laundry, folding clothes, make the bed, cook and washing dishes are mandatory in the family nucleus, how about creating a schedule for everyone?

Family time

You must provide time for affection and warmth; we call it containment and hug. We can play board games, watch a movie, read together or listen to stories. Audible by Amazon has released many stories and books for kids and teens, we can listen to them all together.

Establish break time

Yes, that’s right, we can’t overstimulate the kids, that generates stress; so, it is important to have a quiet time allowing them to rest, block their thoughts, to internalize and recognize themselves.

Obey your instinct

Regulate your emotions and give privilege to communication spaces that invite them to exteriorize their emotions. For instance: “What do you thing about this news?”, “How do you feel inside the house?”, “How can I make your stay at home happier?” “What can you do to help your parents?”

I hope these few tips can help you balance your personal space and have peace at home.

*I want to thank PdyD Verónica Jiménez for her helpful input to our concerns. We are living uncertain times, and now more than ever we need professional advice in order to help our children the best way we can.

Related posts on mi Blog:

An open letter to the Planet after 2 weeks of quarantine

Coronavirus quarantine: Stay home, for crying out loud!

¡Gracias por compartir! / Thanks for sharing!